"Thank you" isn't sufficient, Kelly. Your great pieces have allowed me at age 66 to finally put a term to the way my mind has worked. I had always been tangentially aware of ADHD but hadn't dived in and investigated. It's kind of stunning and liberating and exhilarating! One of those "I'm reading about myself" moments. Much appreciation to you.
SAME! I’m 46. I can’t believe how much I align to what you’re writing Kelly. It’s saving me. I’m in the process of getting a diagnosis, specifically because of your posts.
I remember decades ago when I was identifying limiting and harmful beliefs I held and I recognised that I held the belief that I was never good enough, and I made a mantra to help me change that belief, thinking, 'I am enough just as I am.'
Everytime I noticed myself thinking I could never be good enough, or similar thoughts . I reframed the situation with that mantra. It took a while to shift the pattern and meditation really helped me find that place of 'good enough' within, and I'm so glad I did that.
Once we see that self-defeating beliefs about ourselves are merely beliefs and not reality itself, we can shift them to something more realistic like, Actually, I really am good enough. I'm good enough for me and that's all that matters. I don't have to be 'good enough' for someone else's framework anyway. In fact we were all born good enough.
Trying and failing to keep up with a ghost version of myself. Everything you write here is me to a T. It’s a painful existence and I’m tired of it. I’ve accomplished incredible things, yet it’s never enough.
Ya, I moved west from the busyness of my east coast city upbringing and, even though it has taken years, I have finally slowed down.... which has given me time to be kind to myself and feel better about what I'm doing. Because, as you say, I'm not hurrying on a timeline that was never natural for me.
I can understand /and or relate to dopamine. I identify as a receiving alcoholic/ addict. I truly believe that behaviors give me a dopamine boost. Just talking to my therapist, he concurred about dopamine. If it feels good …
FEEL TERMINALLY LATE TO OUR OWN LIVES - Yes, precisely! And the pace of our culture severely exacerbates this. I'm learning to honor myself and my own pace. Thank you for this great article ❤️🙏
Woke up today and wrote a bit in my journal (which happens from time to time), and I wrote exactly about that : feeling that I wasted half a life time already feeling like I haven't accomplish anything (which obviously depend that scale I'm considering, and obviously, I'm looking at the "change the world" scale.....)
I really like 2 things : 1. The "late bloomer effect", when you mention that we may accomplish or realize something in our 40s which some others may have figured out on their 20s, but when we do so, it's with 20+ years of life experience, meaning it is most likely "deeper", and 2. The made up life script leaving no room for parents with anxiety and so on.... Felt seen.
On a side note : the I'm exploring the life "f* the script" in sexuality, and for now, this is taking me on the asexual path (or maybe it's just a period in my life) and I love it. Giving myself the choice to NOT follow the fucking script !!
"Thank you" isn't sufficient, Kelly. Your great pieces have allowed me at age 66 to finally put a term to the way my mind has worked. I had always been tangentially aware of ADHD but hadn't dived in and investigated. It's kind of stunning and liberating and exhilarating! One of those "I'm reading about myself" moments. Much appreciation to you.
SAME! I’m 46. I can’t believe how much I align to what you’re writing Kelly. It’s saving me. I’m in the process of getting a diagnosis, specifically because of your posts.
All of this resonated so much for me as an adult woman with ADHD (diagnosed as an adult).
This made me feel incredibly seen. Thank you
I remember decades ago when I was identifying limiting and harmful beliefs I held and I recognised that I held the belief that I was never good enough, and I made a mantra to help me change that belief, thinking, 'I am enough just as I am.'
Everytime I noticed myself thinking I could never be good enough, or similar thoughts . I reframed the situation with that mantra. It took a while to shift the pattern and meditation really helped me find that place of 'good enough' within, and I'm so glad I did that.
Once we see that self-defeating beliefs about ourselves are merely beliefs and not reality itself, we can shift them to something more realistic like, Actually, I really am good enough. I'm good enough for me and that's all that matters. I don't have to be 'good enough' for someone else's framework anyway. In fact we were all born good enough.
That is beautifully said, and very helpful. Thank you!
Trying and failing to keep up with a ghost version of myself. Everything you write here is me to a T. It’s a painful existence and I’m tired of it. I’ve accomplished incredible things, yet it’s never enough.
Ya, I moved west from the busyness of my east coast city upbringing and, even though it has taken years, I have finally slowed down.... which has given me time to be kind to myself and feel better about what I'm doing. Because, as you say, I'm not hurrying on a timeline that was never natural for me.
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
🫶
Thank you. I finally see my life through new eyes. I am discovering that I have ADHD and your compassionate approach makes it so much easier.
I couldn’t have put it better myself ❤️thank you ⭐️
Thank you SO MUCH for this ❤️
I can understand /and or relate to dopamine. I identify as a receiving alcoholic/ addict. I truly believe that behaviors give me a dopamine boost. Just talking to my therapist, he concurred about dopamine. If it feels good …
FEEL TERMINALLY LATE TO OUR OWN LIVES - Yes, precisely! And the pace of our culture severely exacerbates this. I'm learning to honor myself and my own pace. Thank you for this great article ❤️🙏
I needee to read this like, now...
Woke up today and wrote a bit in my journal (which happens from time to time), and I wrote exactly about that : feeling that I wasted half a life time already feeling like I haven't accomplish anything (which obviously depend that scale I'm considering, and obviously, I'm looking at the "change the world" scale.....)
I really like 2 things : 1. The "late bloomer effect", when you mention that we may accomplish or realize something in our 40s which some others may have figured out on their 20s, but when we do so, it's with 20+ years of life experience, meaning it is most likely "deeper", and 2. The made up life script leaving no room for parents with anxiety and so on.... Felt seen.
On a side note : the I'm exploring the life "f* the script" in sexuality, and for now, this is taking me on the asexual path (or maybe it's just a period in my life) and I love it. Giving myself the choice to NOT follow the fucking script !!
Why do I see myself in the description of an ADHDer 🥲
I appreciate this.
Yup! 😊